The gift of laughter

Last night and this morning, God gave me a gift. The gift of laughter. I think between last night and this morning, I have laughed more, and harder than I have in the past eight weeks. I had an appointment with J last night. She is such a blessing to me. God is good.

After my appointment, however, I had a little adventure. Somehow I went the wrong way on the highway! I went north instead of south. Instead of being half an hour to get home, it took me an hour and a half! I didn't realize what I had done until I had gone twenty miles the wrong direction. I've been doing that kind of thing quite regularly lately. My concentration is not the greatest! However, when I realized what I had done, instead of crying, I laughed it off. I was talking to one of my best friends S on the phone at the time. After I got off the phone with her and turned around, I listened to some worship music and just spent some time soaking in the goodness of God. I was a little frustrated but I didn't let it get to me.

When I got home, I prepared dinner. S had said her and A were having chicken fajitas which sounded good so I ended up making chicken and black bean tacos. It worked out well. Chris came home and we had a really good dinner. We had a lot of fun teasing and laughing. Even at bedtime, Chris was a riot! His sense of humor was turned on high! He had me giggling like crazy! Then I'd say things like "You're so funny....honey!" which rhymed and I'd laugh harder! I laughed like a small child. It was wonderful. Then we slept....when I got up this morning, I was in a great mood and so was he. We laughed more and more as I got ready and even while he was dropping me off, we were laughing still! He told me last night that I was impish. I was like "I'm impish like a little elf!" This morning I was certainly feeling impish. Here's a photo of me that screams impish!

Anyhow, in the midst of this laughter, I thought of Samantha but for the first time (thank you, Lord!) there wasn't pain attached. I just thought of how much I loved her and how glad I was that God had given her to me even though I never held her here. There's a vast heaven and eternity with Samantha in it that waits for me. Someday I'll get there. For now, I'm learning to be content in the moment. So I thought of Samantha when I looked at a lovely picture of her and Jesus made for me by my dear friend B. But I just smiled. Then when we passed the hospital where I had the D&C, I wasn't sad. I was in one of my laughing moments and I thought how glad I was, even though I had miscarried, that God had given me Samantha, and that He was using this for His glory. I am content to be His and glorify Him because I know that I am nothing without Him!

Praise God, for turning mourning into joy! Thank you for laughter, Lord! You are so good. You are faithful.

~Shannon