12 weeks today

I am twelve weeks pregnant today. Crazy, right?
It is good.

I cried a lot on Sunday. A lot. But Samantha's due date has passed and so we will let that rest behind us and know that Samantha waits ahead, someday when we get to heaven.

The latest frustration is finding out the people who really care about you and accept you for you. Those people are the ones who wouldn't ask you to do something that would be emotionally unhealthy for you. I think that in society we don't put a lot of emphasis on taking care of ourselves emotionally. We talk about eating right, exercising, getting enough sleep...We don't talk about de-stressing, avoiding stressful situations, and keeping from burning out. I truly believe this is true. This means that people are not good at taking care of other people emotionally. If I tell you I am allergic to strawberries, would you tell me just to eat them anyways because they are good and if I only eat two or three it won't be a big deal? Probably not...so why, oh why, would you tell me to do something else that would be emotionally harmful and stressful to me and my baby, and could lead to being sick....? Not sure I get it.....

I am so learning, slowly but surely, who the people in my life are that I can trust.

My five best friends become more and more precious to me each day.....S, R, J, E, and B....They get me, they accept me for me...and would respect me if I told them something was going to be stressful. My sister too...I have had to tell her no before, or disagreed with her, but we don't fight and fight...We can have a healthy disagreement because she cares about me.

The stronger I get, as a person, the less some people will like me. I think I'm getting to be okay with that. I like me. I'm okay with me. I know who I am and what I can handle....I know how to say no...which is important when you have a child. I think it's okay that I'm strong.

Strength is about knowing who you are and what you stand for and not giving into anything less.......

I also don't make decisions without prayer and guidance...for wisdom. Don't doubt me on that. You may only see one piece of the puzzle but that's not my fault.

I am strong. I am.

I am a strong mom today who is taking care of a baby with a strong heartbeat and I have a strong husband who has a good sense of right and wrong and won't settle for anything less. He protects and defends his family and I feel blessed. For all our struggles, Chris and I are strong, and daily we get stronger.

Thank you, Lord, for strength and for providing for our family!

~Shannon

Thank you, Lord, for strength